“When it comes to selling your book, the most important words
you’ll ever write are those on page one.” –Jodie Rhodes, President, Jodie
Rhodes Literary Agency (from Hooked by Les Edgerton).
Most readers and writers alike can agree that the first page—and
even more so, the first line—of a
book carries a very heavy responsibility. I’d even go as far to say that the
first line in your book is the most important sentence in the entirety of your
WIP. Why?
The first line determines if the reader will go on to the
second (then third and fourth, etc.) line (obvious, I know, but important).
The first line is the very first impression readers (and
agents, and editors) have of your manuscript.
The first line carries the responsibility of hooking your
readers into the story, or else they likely won’t move on. (No pressure).
Most of us can agree that the importance of the first
sentence is undeniable. But what makes a good first sentence?
Hooked by Les
Edgerton focuses on, as the title suggests, hooking your readers with your
first scene and naturally, your first sentence (it’s a good read for those of
you who’d like a really in-depth look at the topic beyond the little bit that I talk about here, but I digress). My favorite
point in the book however, came with his theory on the two things that should belong
in first sentences.
According to Edgerton, every first sentence should hint at
trouble and raise a question. Taking a look at some great (in my opinion)
opening lines, I have to agree with him. Let’s take a look:
“When I wake up, the other side of the bed is cold.”—The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins
I’ve seen this line used time and time again as an example
of a great first line and I don’t know about you guys, but I think it’s
brilliant. It also holds up to Edgerton’s theory—although the trouble isn’t
stated directly (it rarely is in first lines), there is certainly a sense of
foreboding as our main character wakes to a cold, empty bed. The question of
course is obvious—why is the other side of the bed cold? Who was she (Katniss,
the protagonist) expecting to be there?
“I’ve been locked up for 264 days.”—Shatter Me by Tahereh Mafi
The trouble and questions are pretty clear here—the trouble
is clearly that our protagonist (Juliette) has been locked up for nearly a
year. We don’t know where exactly, but by the term “locked up” we can assume
it’s some kind of prison. The question of course is why? Why lock someone up
for that long? What did she do to deserve imprisonment? You must read to find
out.
“I see darkness.”—Saint by Ted Dekker
Trouble? Well, waking to darkness isn’t often a good thing
and although we know little about the protagonist’s situation from this first
sentence, we most certainly have a sense that something bad is about to
happen—or perhaps something bad already has. Either way, we want to know why
our main character only sees darkness (the question), so we have to read on to
find out.
“There is one mirror in my house.”—Divergent by Veronica Roth
The trouble here is a little more subtle than in the last
two examples. We don’t know for sure from the first sentence that anything bad
is going to happen, but just the fact that we have to ask why our main character
only has one mirror in her house (and why, as we quickly find out, the mirror
is hidden) gives us a sense that something isn’t quite right.
“Mr. and Mrs. Dursley, of number four, Privet Drive, were
proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much.” –Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone
by J.K. Rowling
How could I go through this kind of post without including
Harry Potter? Obviously, I couldn’t.
In all seriousness, this is the kind of sentence that uses a
sort of reverse-psychology. Just the fact that Mr. and Mrs. Dursley feel the
need to say that they’re perfectly normal indicates that they probably aren’t
(which foreshadows trouble) and also leads the reader to ask why they feel it’s
important everyone know that they’re normal. Do people think they’re strange? If
so, why? We must read on to find the answer.
A sense of foreboding and raising questions can go a long
way to grab your readers’ attention right from the first line—are you using
this technique in your writing?
What are your favorite first lines? Do they create a sense a trouble
and raise questions? I’d love to hear them!
