On Writing Family and Platonic Relationships

Photo credit: FieryLaSirena on Flickr

Sometimes, when writing a book with a romantic subplot, it can be easy to forget about other relationships. From acquaintances, to friends, to family, we all have some kind of relationship network, however large or small, and primarily good or bad it may be.

But especially in YA where romance tends to nearly always be present and family is often—er—killed off, it's easy to write yourself into a situation where the protagonist and love interest are the only people of importance in each other's lives.

And while that can sometimes work in a story, let's be honest—most people's circle of relationships is way more complicated than that.

In YA, platonic relationships that stay platonic are somewhat uncommon, and family relationships tend to go one of two ways: either everyone pretty much gets along (save for the occasional sibling bickering), or there isn't much family in the story at all. (There are exceptions of course, but, you know, generally speaking.)

In my own writing, I've been trying to challenge myself to write dynamic relationships, especially with family members. In Beyond the Red that mostly comes out in sibling relationships, but in one project in particular I'm working on I've been trying to focus more on a dysfunctional family unit and the complicated relationships therein. In part because I think there's still plenty of room for that in YA, and in part because to be frank, I have very complicated family relationships myself.

To the point, platonic relationships—whether through family, friends, or acquaintances—are a pretty huge part of everyone's lives, and certainly a big part of most teens' lives. While it's easy to let a romance overshadow other relationships in a character's life, it can be good to stop and consider what other people are important in your protagonist's life—and how those characters can help develop the plot and your protagonist along the way.

What are some of your favorite platonic and family relationships in YA?

Twitter-sized bite:

Romances aren't the only important fictional relationships. @Ava_Jae talks writing platonic & family relationships. (Click to tweet)

Vlog: How to Write Realistic Relationships

It's Valentine's Day! So in honor of everyone's favorite (*cough*) romantic holiday of the year, here are some tips on writing realistic relationships.

RELATED LINKS: 

• On Character Motivations and Goals (vlog)
• On Writing Messy Characters (vlog)
• How to Write Awesome Kiss Scenes
• How to Write Romance Well
• Romance in Writing: Don't Force It

What are some of your favorite relationships from books, movies, or TV shows?

Twitter-sized bite:

Working on a relationship in your WIP? @Ava_Jae vlogs some tips on writing realistic relationships. #writetip (Click to tweet)

Discussion: What Relationships Would You Like to See More Of?

Photo credit: Kamila Gornia on Flickr

Relationships! I do love reading about them, and writing them is quite a joy as well. But as I’ve been reading, I’ve been thinking lately about some relationship-types that I’d like to see more of—not because they aren’t already well represented, but just because I haven’t come across them quite as much as I’d like. So.

Here is my mini-list of relationships I’d love to read more about:

• Healthy relationships. Easy (Tammara Webber) is a perfect perfect perfect example of this. I never realized quite how much I love a love interest who respects consent and boundaries until I read this book—now I need more.
  
  Also, there can never be too much representation of healthy relationships, am I right? (I am). 


• Bromances. I do love me my bromances, whether it’s Sherlock & Watson, Captain Kirk & Spock, Professor X & Magneto or James Potter & Sirius—bromances just don’t get old. And sadly, most of the favorite examples I can think of immediately are from movies and TV shows, because I really haven’t read enough of these. 


• Relationships that aren’t forever (and it’s okay). I read one book somewhat recently that did this beautifully, but I won’t say which because I don’t want to spoil anything. Point is, I think it’s important to represent relationships that don’t last forever, and the characters move on and survive and are even happy, because not every relationship is happily ever after. And that’s totally normal. 


• Relationships with antagonists. I don’t know about you guys, but I never tire of this, and I definitely don’t see it enough (recommendations are more than welcome). Antagonist relationships not only make for uber-interesting reading, but they also reveal a lot of depth in the antagonist, which complicates the whole plot and to me, makes it insanely amazing. (For examples of this, by the way, check out The Grisha series by Leigh Bardugo and Cruel Beauty by Rosamund Hodge).
  
  NOTE: This does not mean abusive relationships. Relationships with antagonists don't have to be unhealthy. Unhealthy relationships are not preferable. Ever. 

Now what about you? What relationships would you like to read more about?

Twitter-sized bites: 

Bromances, respect, antagonist love & break-ups are relationship elements @Ava_Jae would like to see. How about you? (Click to tweet)  

What relationships would you like to see more of in books? Join the discussion at @Ava_Jae's blog. (Click to tweet)