Book Review: HISTORY IS ALL YOU LEFT ME by Adam Silvera

Photo credit: Goodreads

So I knew going in History is All You Left Me was going to be another heartbreaking Silvera read—I mean, the premise is clearly an emotional one—but wow, I did not anticipate just how powerful and important this book would be.

Before I unabashedly sing History's praises, however, here's the Goodreads summary:

"When Griffin’s first love and ex-boyfriend, Theo, dies in a drowning accident, his universe implodes. Even though Theo had moved to California for college and started seeing Jackson, Griffin never doubted Theo would come back to him when the time was right. But now, the future he’s been imagining for himself has gone far off course. 

To make things worse, the only person who truly understands his heartache is Jackson. But no matter how much they open up to each other, Griffin’s downward spiral continues. He’s losing himself in his obsessive compulsions and destructive choices, and the secrets he’s been keeping are tearing him apart. 

If Griffin is ever to rebuild his future, he must first confront his history, every last heartbreaking piece in the puzzle of his life."

Right, so. I saw people in the GayYA conversation about the book say History starts at heartbreaking and moves toward hope, which is really a perfect way to describe it. A lot of the book is Griffin talking directly to Theo as he processes his grief and moves through a life where Theo is no longer alive. The narrative goes back and forth between the present day and the past, so we get to know Theo and Griffin's history with him, all while knowing how it's ultimately going to end. 

I sometimes have trouble with Contemporary novels keeping my attention, but this definitely wasn't a problem for History. The whole book is so beautifully written—it's raw, and emotional, and real—and had me feeling approximately all of the things a chapter or two in. 

Then there's the OCD rep. This was really interesting to me to read because the things that trigger Griffin and his compulsions are entirely different from the things that bothered me (and sometimes still do) at the height of my worst, uncontrolled probably-OCD anxiety. But that's the thing about mental illnesses—they are so varied in the way they affect people, even though representation tends to focus on one or two ways it manifests. So I was really, really happy to see not-frequently-covered ways OCD can affect someone on the page, because lack of awareness causes so much damage and this fights against it. 

All in all, I really loved this book and I know it'll stick with me for a long time. If you can handle something raw, emotional, and yes, heartbreaking, but also hopeful, then I can't recommend this incredible book more.

Diversity note: All of the main characters are queer—Griffin and Jackson are gay, Theo is bi, and there's another queer boy who says he doesn't like labels. Also, Griffin deals with OCD and (possibly, according to Griffin and his psychiatrist at the end—minor spoiler) a delusional disorder. Both the queer and OCD rep are #ownvoices.

Have you read, or do you plan to read, History?

Twitter-sized bites:

.@Ava_Jae gives 5⭐️s to HISTORY IS ALL YOU LEFT ME by Adam Silvera. Is this beautiful & powerful YA on your TBR? (Click to tweet)

Looking for a raw YA about grief, hope, and mental illness? Try HISTORY IS ALL YOU LEFT ME. (Click to tweet)

Book Review: MORE HAPPY THAN NOT by Adam Silvera

Photo credit: Goodreads

So I’d heard a ton about this book and did that thing I don’t do very often and pre-ordered a book from an author I hadn’t read before. And while More Happy Than Not by Adam Silvera wasn’t quite what I was expecting, I definitely didn’t regret it. 

Before I go on, here’s the Goodreads summary:

“The Leteo Institute's revolutionary memory-relief procedure seems too good to be true to Aaron Soto — miracle cure-alls don't tend to pop up in the Bronx projects. But Aaron can't forget how he's grown up poor or how his friends aren't always there for him. Like after his father committed suicide in their one bedroom apartment. Aaron has the support of his patient girlfriend, if not necessarily his distant brother and overworked mother, but it's not enough.  

Then Thomas shows up. He has a sweet movie-watching setup on his roof, and he doesn't mind Aaron's obsession with a popular fantasy series. There are nicknames, inside jokes. Most importantly, Thomas doesn't mind talking about Aaron's past. But Aaron's newfound happiness isn't welcome on his block. Since he can't stay away from Thomas or suddenly stop being gay, Aaron must turn to Leteo to straighten himself out, even if it means forgetting who he is. 

Adam Silvera's extraordinary debut novel offers a unique confrontation of race, class and sexuality during one charged near-future summer in the Bronx.”

It’s kind of hard to write about this one without spoiling anything, but I do have several thoughts:

Firstly, the intersectionality in this book was so great to see. I loved reading a protagonist who is Latino but not necessarily Spanish-fluent (which doesn’t sound like a big deal, but as a Latina but not exactly Spanish-fluent person myself, it was very nice to see we exist), and I realized while reading this is one of the few YA books I’ve seen with characters from a lower socioeconomic background.

Secondly, this book broke my heart so many times. Emotions go all over the place with this one, with big highs and really sad lows, and I absolutely loved the twist. Aaron and many of the other characters are complicated, layered characters who felt completely real, and they were a treat to read.

I will say that the pacing in the first third of the book or so was a little slower than my liking, and for a while I wasn’t really sure where the plot was going (and when I did think I knew where the plot was going, I was so wrong which was great). But as things began coming together, the whole story wove together really nicely and I definitely enjoyed it.

More Happy Than Not will bring on the feels and really make you connect with the characters. This book was a delight to read and I definitely recommend it to those looking for something different, gritty, and honest.

I’m giving 4/5 stars to this wonderful YA and I can’t wait to read Silvera’s next book!

Diversity note: The protagonist is Latino, gay, and like many of the characters, from a lower socioeconomic background. Other major characters were also PoC, including the main love interest, and the protagonist also suffers from depression.

What have you been reading lately? 

Twitter-sized bites: 

.@Ava_Jae gives 4/5 stars to MORE HAPPY THAN NOT by @AdamSilvera. Have you read this intersectional YA? (Click to tweet) 

Looking for an emotional, twisty, honest YA read? Check out MORE HAPPY THAN NOT by Adam Silvera. (Click to tweet)

Top 10 Books I’m Looking Forward to in 2015

2015 is an incredible year for books. My TBR list has all but exploded and every post like this one puts new amazing reads on my Goodreads’s shelf. 

There are a ridiculous amount of incredible books coming out this year that I'm looking forward to, but I've narrowed it down to my top ten. It wasn't easy. But here they are with their Goodreads summaries (in chronological order by release date):

Photo credit: Goodreads

1. Trust the Focus by Megan Erickson (March 17)
   
   “With his college graduation gown expertly pitched into the trash, Justin Akron is ready for the road trip he planned with his best friend Landry— and ready for one last summer of escape from his mother’s controlling grip. Climbing into the Winnebago his father left him, they set out across America in search of the sites his father had captured through the lens of his Nikon.
   
   As an aspiring photographer, Justin can think of no better way to honor his father’s memory than to scatter his father’s ashes at the sites he held sacred. And there’s no one he’d rather share the experience with more than Landry.
   
   But Justin knows he can’t escape forever. Eventually he’ll have to return home and join his mother’s Senate campaign. Nor can he escape the truth of who he is, and fact that he’s in love with his out-and-proud travel companion.
   
   Admitting what he wants could hurt his mother’s conservative political career. But with every click of his shutter and every sprinkle of ash, Justin can’t resist Landry’s pull. And when the truth comes into focus, neither is prepared for the secrets the other is hiding.”
   
   Why I’m excited: Firstly, I love Megan because her voice is just so fun and so NA perfect. Secondly, m/m NA. Do I need to say more? (I don’t need to say more.)







Photo credit: Goodreads






Half Wild (Half Bad Trilogy, #2) by Sally Green (March 24)

“‘You will have a powerful Gift, but it’s how you use it that will show you to be good or bad.’

In a modern-day England where two warring factions of witches live amongst humans, seventeen-year-old Nathan is an abomination, the illegitimate son of the world's most powerful and violent witch. Nathan is hunted from all sides: nowhere is safe and no one can be trusted. Now, Nathan has come into his own unique magical Gift, and he's on the run--but the Hunters are close behind, and they will stop at nothing until they have captured Nathan and destroyed his father.”

Why I’m excited: Half Bad, the first in the trilogy, was my favorite read of 2014 and my favorite book about wizards since Harry Potter. I’ve never loved a book as quickly as I did Half Bad and I can’t wait to see what happens in the sequel. Plus there’s a ship I really want to see sail…








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Simon vs. The Homo Sapiens Agenda by Becky Albertalli (April 7)

“Sixteen-year-old and not-so-openly gay Simon Spier prefers to save his drama for the school musical. But when an email falls into the wrong hands, his secret is at risk of being thrust into the spotlight. Now Simon is actually being blackmailed: if he doesn’t play wingman for class clown Martin, his sexual identity will become everyone’s business. Worse, the privacy of Blue, the pen name of the boy he’s been emailing, will be compromised.

With some messy dynamics emerging in his once tight-knit group of friends, and his email correspondence with Blue growing more flirtatious every day, Simon’s junior year has suddenly gotten all kinds of complicated. Now, change-averse Simon has to find a way to step out of his comfort zone before he’s pushed out—without alienating his friends, compromising himself, or fumbling a shot at happiness with the most confusing, adorable guy he’s never met.”

Why I’m excited: I’ve been making a point to read more diverse books, and this one just sounds really excellent. Plus I keep hearing from people who have read it how amazing it is, which is a bonus.








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The Death Code (The Murder Complex, #2) by Lindsay Cummings (April 21)

“With short, fast-paced, alternating point-of-view chapters, The Death Code starts several weeks after The Murder Complex ended. Zephyr keeps the secret about Meadow close—that if she dies, The Murder Complex will be destroyed, too. Meadow, desperate to find her brother, father, and little sister, is determined to fearlessly fight to the end, even if it means sacrificing herself and her friends, new and old. The Death Code introduces a memorable cast of secondary characters and delivers a vivid and scary thrill ride read.”

Why I’m excited: The Murder Complex was a really fast-paced, exciting, bloody read, and the cliffhanger definitely has me looking forward to this sequel.








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An Ember in the Ashes by Sabaa Tahir (April 28)

“LAIA is a Scholar living under the iron-fisted rule of the Martial Empire. When her brother is arrested for treason, Laia goes undercover as a slave at the empire’s greatest military academy in exchange for assistance from rebel Scholars who claim that they will help to save her brother from execution.

ELIAS is the academy’s finest soldier—and secretly, its most unwilling. Elias is considering deserting the military, but before he can, he’s ordered to participate in a ruthless contest to choose the next Martial emperor.

When Laia and Elias’s paths cross at the academy, they find that their destinies are more intertwined than either could have imagined and that their choices will change the future of the empire itself.”

Why I’m excited: Besides the stunning cover, this fantasy sounds super exciting and I have a sneaking suspicion the worldbuilding is going to be excellent.








Photo credit: Goodreads






Made You Up by Francesca Zappia (May 19)

“Alex fights a daily battle to figure out the difference between reality and delusion. Armed with a take-no-prisoners attitude, her camera, a Magic 8-Ball, and her only ally (her little sister), Alex wages a war against her schizophrenia, determined to stay sane long enough to get into college. She’s pretty optimistic about her chances until classes begin, and she runs into Miles. Didn't she imagine him? Before she knows it, Alex is making friends, going to parties, falling in love, and experiencing all the usual rites of passage for teenagers. But Alex is used to being crazy. She’s not prepared for normal.”

Why I’m excited: Basically I’ve wanted to read this since Chessie’s book sold forever ago, and since then I’ve had no less than a million people rave about its amazingness, and I really just need it in my hands right now okay? (Also: mental illness representation! In YA! GIVE IT TO ME.)








Photo credit: Goodreads






More Happy Than Not by Adam Silvera (June 16)

“Happiness shouldn't be this hard…

The Leteo Institute's revolutionary memory-relief procedure seems too good to be true to Aaron Soto -- miracle cure-alls don't tend to pop up in the Bronx projects. But Aaron can't forget how he's grown up poor or how his friends aren't always there for him. Like after his father committed suicide in their one bedroom apartment. Aaron has the support of his patient girlfriend, if not necessarily his distant brother and overworked mother, but it's not enough.

Then Thomas shows up. He has a sweet movie-watching setup on his roof, and he doesn't mind Aaron's obsession with a popular fantasy series. There are nicknames, inside jokes. Most importantly, Thomas doesn't mind talking about Aaron's past. But Aaron's newfound happiness isn't welcome on his block. Since he's can't stay away from Thomas or suddenly stop being gay, Aaron must turn to Leteo to straighten himself out, even if it means forgetting who he is.

Adam Silvera's extraordinary debut novel offers a unique confrontation of race, class and sexuality during one charged near-future summer in the Bronx.”

Why I’m excited: This is another one I’ve heard a lot of good things about, plus the premise sounds excellent, plus I’m always happy to diversify my bookshelf.







Carry On by Rainbow Rowell (October 6)

(No cover yet.)

“Simon Snow just wants to relax and savor his last year at the Watford School of Magicks, but no one will let him. His girlfriend broke up with him, his best friend is a pest, and his mentor keeps trying to hide him away in the mountains where maybe he’ll be safe. Simon can’t even enjoy the fact that his roommate and longtime nemesis is missing, because he can’t stop worrying about the evil git. Plus there are ghosts. And vampires. And actual evil things trying to shut Simon down. When you’re the most powerful magician the world has ever known, you never get to relax and savor anything.”

Why I’m excited: Once upon a time I finished reading Fangirl and tweeted that if Rainbow Rowell ever wrote a gay vampire/wizard book, I would buy it in a heartbeat. Less than a month later, Carry On was announced and I nearly died of excitement.







Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo (October 8)

(No cover yet.)

“Ketterdam: a bustling hub of international trade where anything can be had for the right price—and no one knows that better than criminal prodigy Kaz Brekker. Kaz is offered a chance at a deadly heist that could make him rich beyond his wildest dreams. But he can't pull it off alone...

A convict with a thirst for revenge.

A sharpshooter who can't walk away from a wager.

A runaway with a privileged past.

A spy known as the Wraith.

A Heartrender using her magic to survive the slums.

A thief with a gift for unlikely escapes.

Six dangerous outcasts. One impossible heist. Kaz's crew is the only thing that might stand between the world and destruction—if they don't kill each other first.”

Why I’m excited: More Bardugo + more Grisha = INSTAYES. (Also, this sounds pretty darn awesome.)







Prom Bitch by Ami Allen-Vath (November)

(No cover yet.)

“A high school senior navigating prom season amidst panic attacks, a new boyfriend, & a suicide letter from the class outcast.”

Why I’m excited: With a title like that, how could I not be excited? In all seriousness, this sounds great and I’m particularly curious about the mental illness representation.

Others (because the list was getting too long!): Heartsick by Caitlin Sinead, A Court of Thorns and Roses by Sarah Maas, None of the Above by I.W. Gregorio, Red Queen by Victoria Aveyard, What We Left Behind by Robin Talley, and Hello, I Love You by Katie M. Stout.

What 2015 releases are you looking forward to? 

Twitter-sized bite: 

.@Ava_Jae shares ten books she's looking forward to in 2015. Are these excellent 2015 releases on your TBR list? (Click to tweet)